"What we cannot accept in another is always something we haven't been able to accept in ourselves."
I read this statement recently and it gave me pause. Do you think it's true?
Susan
Saturday, December 30, 2006
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3 comments:
I think it's a bit too neat to work for me. I don't accept cheating in others and I'm not a cheater, for instance.
However, I do think there is value in checking out a discomfort and looking to see how that discomfort is something I can take responsibility for - why am I bugged? What is upsetting me? Is this displaced discomfort?
That sort of thing.
I have found it to be more true than not. Often the kids that bug me most are the ones that really are most like me :)
When I am trying to figure out why someone is frustrating me I do check out the why and see how much of it is me or my perception of what is happening.
It's classic in pychotherapy. And I have noticed as well. You can almost only notice traits in others that you have yourself. This applies to traits and those we have judgements about rather than beliefs about what is right and wrong.
It's close to projection, another classic, which is when you project onto others what you can't admit in yourself. OJ did it big time.
I'll come back when I can read more.
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